How Mr. S made me orgasm without even touching me...

What sorcery is this? No-hands-orgasms? The answer, is: SKYPE SEX. Mr. S and I had our first sexual encounter over Skype very recently, and we really enjoyed it. It can seem daunting and also has the potential to be quite awkward... here's how we kept things interesting with a 2-week-wait to go before reuniting.

I'd been teasing Mr. S with cheeky photos that didn't quite reveal exactly what he wanted to see for the first 3 weeks we were apart. It had got to a point where I was so aroused after receiving a text from him, telling me that he was thinking of me as he came... Everything had come to a head, and before I knew it, I had sent some sort of suggestive text informing him that I had the house to myself and wasn't doing anything but signing into Skype. 

Without a doubt, the arousal and excitement pushed me into sending that text. In our day to day lives, we send each other very forward and sometimes very naughty texts - I even do it just to cheer him up sometimes! So it wasn't really anything new, me sending a text suggesting Skype sex. 

All it was, was that I hadn't fully thought it through. And girls and boys, there is a lot to think about relating to Skype sex. I present to you:

Things you should think about before proposing Skype sex (that is to occur immediately):

Skype sex can be hard to figure out...

1. Consider your opening pose. I didn't do this. At all. I video-called Mr. S and I was lying on my bed in my standard indoor attire: think tracksuit bottoms that are probably 5 years old, a huge hoodie that probably doesn't belong to me (and of clashing colour to the trousers), no make up and hair scraped up into a high pony. So in a nutshell; not looking my best. 

This put me in such a predicament, because as luck would have it, Mr. S answered my call without a shirt on. And he was looking... so fine. All he had on was a pair of boxer shorts. So as I lay on my bed, feeling a little like a hermit, I started to get really quite awkward. How could I even go about removing my clothes and manage to look sexy at the same time?

Would have been living the dream if it had been like this

2. How will you make your partner feel comfortable? Mr. S started teasing me, asking where the show he had been expecting was. And I felt nothing but awkward. I was slowly becoming less aroused and more and more awkward as he put his hand down his boxers and I was fully clothed. 

I've never felt this way in person with him, and I really didn't handle it well (you've never seen somebody so awkward). Eventually, a long 10 minutes later, I somehow communicated to him that I wasn't all that turned on and felt pretty awkward. 

Pretty much how I felt... so not sexy

As I've mentioned before, Mr. S isn't a man of many words, which means he often doesn't say quite the right thing. But when I told him that I was feeling sheepish, he just turned the camera to his face and off of his crotch - VERY distracting - and started telling me why he couldn't wait to see me. I know dirty talk doesn't work for everyone, but boy did it work that night for me. Which leads me to my next point...


3. The importance of speaking...  even though it's 'cyber-sex', and the point is that you get to watch your partner put a personal show on just for you, I think talking is still so important. He didn't say anything fancy, or over-complicated; it was the simple things that helped. When Mr. S told me he couldn't wait to play with and have his mouth around my nipples, I went from feeling like an unattractive homeless lady to being so ready for action. It's always turned me on when boys take an interest in nipple play - because so many of them overlook it. 

Hoodie off = the world is your oyster

I got so warm, that I genuinely had to take my hoodie off, and from then on it was easy. I turned my camera off of my face and onto my body, and asked him what he wanted to see. By asking him, and then getting an answer, it made things so much more exciting and flirty - because just because they want it, doesn't mean we have to give it, right girls?

4. Tease. It is a show, after all. I slowly lifted my top up, just to show a hint of breast... I was playing with my boobs and squeezing my nipples over my top... I could hear his breathing and I knew he was wanking to the sight of it. A little while after I peeled my top off (unfortunately I hadn't had a bra on to begin with - indoors day, remember - so couldn't tease him further) but just carried on squeezing them together, pinching at my nipples. 

Channel your inner porn star.

The key, girls, is confidence. At the end of the day our guys find us sexy, whether we agree with them or not. He isn't skyping you just to have a quick wank and then carry on about his day. That's what porn is for. He is skyping you because he wants you to put on a show, he wants to enjoy watching you move and touch all the parts of your body that he loves to play with himself. 

To begin with, it might seem cringey, and a little embarrassing. But trust me, if you're getting turned on by the thought of him getting turned on by you - it is so much easier. I am not ashamed to say that once I got into it, I put on such a show for Mr. S... after I was just in my underwear he even asked me to keep them on for a bit... teasing is pleasing. 

Put on a show, make him want more.

5. The moment you orgasm. I started to touch myself as I normally would, with the only difference being that I had to find a good angle for the laptop. Watching Mr. S stroking himself got me so wet, it didn't take me much longer than usual to come (by myself), and the reason it did was probably because of the added distraction of Mr. S. 

Mr. S's orgasm however... is another story. Afterwards, I called it stage fright. He didn't come for a good 30 minutes. Now, I realise, this is not a huge length of time, certainly not compared to some of the long sessions we have when we're together. But for a standard wank with the added bonus of watching me touch myself, watching me orgasm on camera, and then watching me get into positions I knew he'd find attractive; half an hour is quite a long time. And for him, it felt longer because I'd already finished. His opinion was that after I came he was trying to make sure he didn't take ages, and in doing that, it was harder for him to orgasm, with the additional pressure of thinking I was getting bored (I wasn't - I was in the performance zone.)

If either you or your partner do get a little stage fright - just remember to act as you would if you were with them. It takes patience and supportive words to get them thinking about how attractive they find you, rather than thinking about how long it's taking them. 

Lingerie can help boost your confidence, especially on camera

I suppose, at the end of the day, the majority of what I've said comes down to making your partner feel comfortable and attractive. Every couple has their own way of doing that, this is just an example of how we did it. There are so many ways to deal with the potential worries cyber-sex brings with it, here are some brief things I thought of...

• Girls, try wearing some sexy lingerie (or dressing up, if that's what you're into) when you go on camera... I guarantee it will make you feel so gorgeous and your man will love you all the more for it. 
• But it's up to you too fellas... don't just point your camera at your dick and expect your girl to get turned on. We all know it takes us a little more to get warmed up; so talk to her, tell her what you want to do to her, what you miss doing the most. Trust me, it works. 
• Remember that you're doing this for each other's pleasure and enjoyment. He's seen you naked a hundred times before - any bad camera angle you think you can find, he's probably seen it. And he's still sticking around.
• I'd recommend using a laptop or any hands-free device... it makes it easier to forget about the fact that everything you're doing is being watched and you can just leave it beside you, as opposed to a phone that you have to continuously hold. Always helps if you want two hands free to play as well...

I really hope this helps anyone considering Skype sex - especially if you're in a long-distance relationship or just away from each other for a little longer than usual. Hopefully it will calm any worries you have, but feel free to get in touch with me, as always. 

Happy Good Friday!

Love, B. xo

Twitter: @BLAIRTALKSSEX

Email: talktomissblair@gmail.com